When I was a freshman in college, I put a lot of pressure on myself. I was a straight A student in high school and things came easy to me.
But when I attended this small private college in South Carolina, I felt like a fish out of water. All of the other students around me seemed so much smarter than me and I felt like the dunce of the school. By studying hours and hours every day and night, I was able to keep up with the others but it was hard work. School work at college was so very different than high school. I wasn’t used to studying this hard just to maintain good grades. When I failed my first test, I was crushed! Luckily the professor took pity on me and let me retake it. The reason that I failed was not because I didn’t study but because I froze from fear and couldn’t remember a single thing! This fear continued the whole first semester.
By the time final exams came, I was not eating regularly (I hated the campus food) or sleeping well. I started to have major panic attacks and had to carry a paper bag with me to help my hyperventilating. In fact, I lost 30 lbs. and was under 100 lbs. so I was put on probation (I think they were afraid that I had anorexia.) I couldn’t return after Christmas unless I weighed over 100 lbs. and was eating right. I also had to learn relaxation techniques to stop the panic. So, to get through final exams, the school made me drink peanut butter chocolate milkshakes three times a day and practice deep breathing as well as walking for exercise. These really helped me tremendously.
When I came back to school in January, I weighed over 100 lbs. and was doing much better mentally. I also think I was homesick since it was my first time ever being away from home and 800 miles was a long way. The school actually gave me a special card for my dinners to be made at the student center grill just for me. I think this caring attitude at school helped me get through my first year too.
Original image: 'don't panic!'
http://www.flickr.com/photos/20771223@N00/15529699 by: Jon Moe
1 comment:
yes. Ive had two panic attacks. It caused my blood pressure to go sky high - and I couldn't control my breathing. It was very scary.
I don't even know what caused them
Post a Comment