My World and Welcome to It!

These are my thoughts and opinions about life in general. I also get daily prompts from DSP which inspire me to write. If I throw in some scrapbook pages I've done, photos I've taken, and stories about me, you will have an idea about my loony life!

Friday, July 21, 2006

The Best Advice

The best advice I got was about 22 years ago when I first started teaching on the high school level. A fellow teacher told me that I needed to start taking care of myself before I could be a good caretaker of others. After 2 months at my new job, my daughter was having emotional problems, my husband lost his job, and my house caught on fire causing me to move in with my inlaws. Within 2 weeks of the fire, my hair started to come out by the hand fulls and I was completely bald by Christmas. The doctor kept asking me if I was under any stress and I didn't think I was because I believed I was handling all the things that were happening. After thousands of dollars worth of tests, the doctors shrugged my shoulders and said they didn't have any answers for me. They told me that my hair had fallen out by the roots and would never grow back. So, not knowing what else to do, my husband bought me a years membership into a fitness club near where we lived and encouraged me to go there an hour each evening. He made dinner every night and worked on homework with my daughters while I was gone. I think my situation scared him and he didn't know what to do for me. We decided that I needed to eat healthier and exercise more so I did that and amazingly, my hair grew back, contrary to doctor's beliefs! Now we believe that stress did that to me and whenever I am under stress, my hair starts to fall out. I just increase my walking, start focusing on my eating, and do a lot of relaxation exercises. I do better at helping others when I have taken care of mine own health first.

PS. Update to my marriage proposal: at first my dad wouldn't speak to my hubby. He was extremely rude to hubby by pretending he didn't even exist in the same room. I had to tell my dad that he was making me choose between them and it was really hurting me. I couldn't keep asking my hubby to be treated badly when he drove 700 miles 4 times a year for me to see my family. After that, each year my dad got a little better with being around my hubby. After 5 years, my dad and hubby finally talked to each other. When my mother died about 14 years ago, my dad started to date again and remarried 16 months after my mother's death. My dad asked my hubby to be best man at the wedding and to top it all off, my dad married a non-Chinese woman! (And we love her dearly!)

4 comments:

heather said...

Glad you hubby and your dad learnt to get along. These things can just take time I guess. What a stressful time you had when you started teaching, that's hard enough in itself without everything else that was going on in your life. At least your hair is a good stress barometer for you. I have trouble eating properly when I'm teaching, trying to fit in breakfast in the morning rush, trying to fit in lunch during playground duty/last minute photocopying or whatever, but you're right the time taken to care for yourself first is important.

Unknown said...

Oh Pat, the same thing happens to my mom when she was under stress, but fortunately her doctor and hairdresser both told her what was doing it and that her hair would grow back after she relieved her stress and it did.

I am so glad to hear that your hubby and dad finally managed to break the chains that kept them apart. Well, at least your dad did. Though I am sure it was because hubby wasn't going to give up on it.

Webfrau said...

That sounds like very sage advice you were given there.
I'm so glad your parents came round in the end.

Bonnie said...

Wow, what a story! Stress is a strange thing, a few months ago I found a lump in one of my breasts and went for scans and tests, luckily it was all negative, but the stress before was awful! I broke out all over my face and neck with itchy spots (hives?) and I looked terrible for about two weeks! As soon as the results came back negative and I knew I was going to be okay, my face returned to normal in two days! The mind is powerful. And my hair falls out in a handfull(full handfull!) everyday, so for me that would not be a way to tell! I am glad that things got sorted out eventually between your dad and husband, that must of been a good day/time for you!